Wednesday, November 11, 2009

My New Blog

I got tired of having five blogs and didn't want to just create a sixth, so this blog is really bipolar disorder plus life in general. I was diagnosed about a month ago. Currently I take Lithium, Lamictal, Risperdal, and a multivitamin. I will head back to school in December and we'll take it from there.

Today I found out that I cannot donate bone marrow. The Lithium renders my bone marrow useless. I feel...cheated, somehow; marrow donation was a pet dream of mine. Over the last year and a half, I nurtured it and it grew, until marrow donation was the only sure thing in my future.

And now it all comes crashing down.

Everyone loses dreams to bipolar disorder...Heck, everybody eventually loses dreams anyway. But mine was not a normal teenage dream. I didn't dream of traveling the world and getting drunk; I never wanted to party all night. All I wanted was to donate bone marrow, to give up my body for God's purposes and save a life.

And now I can't.

Why do bad things happen to good people?

5 comments:

  1. You should definitely consider getting a Twitter account so you can update us frequently whenever a thought strikes!

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  2. This post is truly sad and yet so inspirational. I look forward to reading every update that you post in the future and following your struggle. There is one thing however that I am unclear about. What exactly do you mean that you "nurtured" your bone marrow? Could you elaborate?

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  3. Oh, pardon me I'm an imbecile. I misread your post. Never mind

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  4. Hi,
    I am bipolar as well and although I have never taken lithium and am currently not on medication, I can't donate marrow either. I'm working on finding out specifically why I can't donate so hopefully I can start to figure out a way around this. People with bipolar have the ability to live perfectly normal lives and to deny a person the chance to help others seems unfair.

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  5. Samantha,

    I just read your comment and I hope you check back. Not being able to donate marrow has actually shown me that bipolar disorder has NOT denied me the chance to help others. In fact, bipolar disorder has made me aware of how lucky I am and driven me to help others every single day. Just look for little opportunities: picking up litter, hugging a friend, a small donation to charity: it all counts. Good luck!

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